DEALING WITH GRIEF, Part 5

Today's Devotional: Dealing with grief is perhaps one of the hardest things that we, as humans, must do. Grief may be rooted in a death or illness, or it may be rooted in a loss, such as the loss of support, the loss of a spouse through divorce, the loss of a job, or even the feelings of abandonment that parents often go through as they realize they must allow their children to grow up. The focus of the upcoming 6 devotionals, that will be appearing in the next 6 Saturday editions of The Nugget, will be on specific, personal stories of how God can help you deal with grief. Our prayer is that you will be blessed by this series, and that somehow, whatever it is you are grieving, the lessons presented here will help you to get through. For former lessons on Dealing with Grief, please go to www.scripturalnuggets.org/folder6/dealing_with_grief.htm

DEALING WITH GRIEF, Part 5

In Dealing with Grief Part 4, we learned that when tragedy strikes, all you need is God! He's the only one who can get you through! These types of situations can drive us closer to Him, and when they do, our lives are blessed beyond compare. And sharing our pain with others is not only one way to help ease their pain, but it also helps to ease ours! Today's devotional will take us through the one of my own personal experience and how God helped me through …

DEALING WITH … SUICIDE!

My younger brother and I were never very close as kids or as young adults. We had little in common, and he made fun of my faith in God. That all changed after my dad died. He began asking questions and one day he emailed wanting to know more about my God. His life changed 100% at this time, and though all of the experiences that would happen over the next few years are too many to tell, it wasn't long before his unwavering faith began to teach me a lesson or two.

But then it all began to change. He began experiencing personal problems, and though he initially stood strong, his faith eventually began to waver. He started asking questions, the same sort of questions that we all ask in times of trouble: Why is God allowing this to happen to me? How could a loving God allow this to happen?

It wasn't long after this that he turned his back on God completely. Though my husband and I tried to reach out to him, he refused to speak to us, refused our emails, and refused our phone calls. We were completely out of touch with him for the next 18 months.

I remember driving down the road one day, crying out to God in prayer for my brother, when I was impressed to turn on the CD player. The song that filled the car was one about the cross of Jesus. It highlighted how even Jesus' closest friends didn't understand His death, and how lost they felt during the time Jesus was in the grave. But in the end, what a glorious outcome! Through this song, God spoke to me about my brother, assuring me that though I didn't understand what was going on, in the end, it would be beautiful.

I took great comfort in the words.

It wasn't long after that that I got the call from my sister-in-law. My brother had taken his life.

The next two days passed in a blur. There were plane tickets to buy, arrangements to be made, suitcases to pack, but through it all, there was no time to grieve, no time to think.

I was on the plane, flying to California with my mother and husband when it began to hit home that my brother had taken his life after turning his back on God. On the one hand, I had always believed that someone who takes his own life will not be in Heaven. Especially someone who had turned their back on God. But on the other hand, God is a God of love, and He doesn't want any of His children to be lost. God would have done everything in His power to bring my brother back to Him, and having been out of touch for 18 months, I knew nothing about the spiritual state of his heart. When my dad had passed away 5 years earlier, I had known that he would spend eternity with Jesus and had taken great comfort in this fact. But would my brother spend eternity with Jesus?

I took it to God in prayer: "Lord, is my brother in Heaven?"

But there was no answer forthcoming, and the question haunted me for the next two days. I couldn't sleep, I had no appetite, and all I could think about was my brother's final destination.

When God did finally give me the answer, it was not at all what I had expected …

I was sitting in a fast food restaurant in Southern California, waiting for my husband to arrive with the food that I had no appetite to eat. I again began to pray, pleading with God: "Please, just give me some assurance that my brother is in Heaven!"

God sometimes speaks in mysterious, covert ways, but not that day. That day He spoke loud and clear, so clear that I had to look around to see if anyone else had heard His voice: "That, My child, is NOT your business to know!"

"What?" Cried out my thoughts. "Of course it's my business to know!"

"No," was the clear response. "It doesn't change anything about your relationship with Me. I want you to trust Me enough to not need to know!"

"I …" But I couldn't continue because I understood loud and clear: God wanted me to quit carrying this burden. He wanted me to give it to Him! And as soon as the realization washed over me, I knew He was right! "Okay," I whispered. "I release my brother's location for eternity into Your hands!"

Immediately a wave of comfort washed over me, filling every crevice, cleansing me all the way through to my innermost thoughts and feelings.

And that comfort from God has remained with me ever since.

But the story doesn't end here. About three years later, as I was driving late at night to pick up my son from youth, my mind began to review the events that had happened around the time of my brother's death, and I remembered the song God had used to comfort me. Just then, that same came on the radio. And then God spoke to me through this song. He reminded me of how He had assured me three years earlier that I wouldn't understand what was going on, but in the end, the outcome would be beautiful. "Does this mean …?" I whispered. Then a sense of peace like I have never known washed over me, and I knew beyond a doubt: My brother was … with Jesus!

Friends, suicide is an extreme kind of death to have to deal with. But remember: Whatever the nature of the grief you are going through, when you trust God with your deepest worries, no matter what their source, you open the door to His comfort. You allow Him to carry you through!

In His love, Lyn Chaffart*

Friends, please remember: whatever the nature of the grief you are going through, you can trust God with your deepest worries, no matter what their source. And whenyou do, you open the door to His comfort. Please join us next Saturday, for Dealing with Grief, Part 6: Lightening Strikes.

* Lyn Chaffart, Mother of two teens, Author and Moderator for The Nugget, a tri-weekly internet newsletter, and Scriptural Nuggets, a website devoted to Christian devotionals and inspirational poems, www.scripturalnuggets.org, with Answers2Prayer Ministries, www.Answers2Prayer.org .

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OF LOVE AND PUNISHMENT

When I was a kid, my dad often used a line on me that I didn’t understand: “I only punish you because I love you!” It didn’t feel like love at the time, but oh how wrong I was!

It’s not that I was particularly bad as a child. I was just stubborn. I loved my father and wanted to please him, but it seemed that I constantly found myself trying to test the boundaries and the limits he had established for my own good and protection. I recall one particular incident from my very early childhood quite vividly.

When I was 5 years old I had a certain wooden rocking horse that I was quite fond of. The only draw back was that it wasn’t quite tall enough. I wanted to be like the cowboys I saw in the movies, riding alongside trains and horse wagons, guns blazing, in hot pursuit of some bandana masked criminal.

The solution to my problem came in the form of an old mahogany chest that my parents kept in the living room, a wedding present from someone in the family. The chest was incredibly heavy. It stood about 2 1/2 feet tall and had a soft felt cushion on its top. Glancing around the room for something for which to set my rocking horse on top of to gain some height, it didn’t take long before I noticed the chest.

Excitedly, I drug my trusty steed over to it and managed to place it on top. Climbing on top of the chest and then into my horse, I vaulted over the lateral bars and slid my feet through the holes in the front and took a seat. Generally, I would say that my parents kept a very watchful eye on me, but this time I somehow managed to sneak one by them. The joy that came from gleefully rocking my horse from my newly elevated position was indescribable. With determination, I zeroed in on the bandit and almost had him in my sights when suddenly my dad showed up to foil the impending shoot out. To this day, I still remember having received a spanking and being sent to my room. Knowing my parents I am sure I also received a lengthy lecture about how dangerous what I was doing was and how I could have been seriously hurt. However, with the taste of the immediate joy I had experienced riding atop my high horse still fresh in my mind it wasn’t long before I was up to my schemes again. A couple days later I went for a second attempt. Little did I know this time the joy would not be quite as sweet and the punishment bitterer. When my mother and father caught me again, I did the worst possible thing I could have done; I smiled.

“Oh no,” my father exclaimed, “You aren’t going to cutesy your way out of this one!” The lesson I learned in all of this is that while sin and disobedience may at first taste sweet, you can “be sure that your sin will find you out” (Numbers 32:33). I do not write to impose legalism on anyone, but I thank God that Jesus Christ paid the ultimate price by becoming sin for us. Through His obedience alone have we obtained righteousness! (2 Corinthians 5:21).

However, I believe the Bible is clear that even (perhaps especially) for those of us whom are covered by His righteousness, we will still be chastised for our sins (Hebrews 12:5-8). This Bible verse affirms that we should not despise the chastening of the Lord, as I did my earthly father’s in my time of disobedience, but rather we should be grateful to know that our chastening confirms our salvation and is for our own good. We can rest assured knowing that God disciplines us because He loves us and like any good Father, He always does what is best for us, even if it isn’t enjoyable at the time. His chastening is the process through which we are all being sanctified and transformed into the image of His son, our Lord and savior, Jesus Christ.

My brothers and sisters in Christ, strive in all things to be righteous and holy, but when you do slip up, I urge you to not despise the Lord’s chastening, but instead to embrace it as we do all things that we know to be good for us.

Zach Liston

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WHEN A GOOD THING IS A BAD THING!

"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God". Romans 8:28

Are you ever tempted to second-guess God? What about that time the car wouldn't start and finally, as you were driving to your appointment - late - you saw a fatal accident along your way? Or a certain item that you wanted but couldn't get for some reason and later you found the same item - ON SALE? This kind of experience could be viewed as a bad thing turned good.

Dundee came into my life about a year ago. He was a 'rescue kitty' and a gift from my grandsons. The rescue center where he came from guessed his age to be about 4 months and he was s-o-o cute and friendly and funny.

A rescue kitty often has many hardships before it is rescued and in Dundee's case it left its scars. Dundee is very afraid of big dogs and loud noises.

My grandsons have a golden retriever named Salida. Salida is a very well mannered young lady, very friendly and she rarely barks or gets ruffled but she IS curious and this new ball of fur at my house was very interesting to her. Dundee, on the other hand, was NOT impressed with HER! In fact, he was SO UNIMPRESSED that he became very creative as to hiding places. Early on, he learned to associate the opening of the garage door with a visit from Salida and so whenever he hears the garage door opening, he will run and hide. Funny little kitty!

Recently we had a big rainfall. Now here in Canada most places have basements and those basements have sump pumps. On the day of this story, I noticed that Dundee was running and hiding often - and I realized that he was hiding every time the sump pump came on. He mistook a good thing - the operation of the pump - for a bad thing (in his mind) the opening of the garage door; which might lead to a visit from the D-O-G!

Are we so different? Do we mistake a good thing for a bad thing? I wonder.

Wynona Gordon

Announcements:

As requested by Nugget readers, The Nugget is happy to announce that through the months of May and June, a series of devotionals on Dealing with Grief will be appearing in the Saturday edition of the Nugget. If you have ever lost anyone you are close to, you will be able to relate. Our prayer is that somehow, your hard times will be eased a bit by this mini-series.

DEALING WITH GRIEF, Part 4

Dealing with grief is perhaps one of the hardest things that we, as humans, must do. Grief may be rooted in a death or illness, or it may be rooted in a loss, such as the loss of support, the loss of a spouse through divorce, the loss of a job, or even the feelings of abandonment that parents often go through as they realize they must allow their children to grow up. The focus of the upcoming 7 devotionals, that will be appearing in the next 7 Saturday editions of The Nugget, will be on specific, personal stories of how God can help you deal with grief. Our prayer is that you will be blessed by this series, and that somehow, whatever it is you are grieving, the lessons presented here will help you to get through. For former lessons on Dealing with Grief, please go to www.scripturalnuggets.org/folder6/dealing_with_grief.htm .

DEALING WITH GRIEF, Part 4

In Dealing with Grief Part 3, we learned that though we may feel totally alone when we go through our grief, but we are never really alone. God is always there with us, carrying us through. All we need to do is rely on Him. Today's devotional will take us through the personal experience of Sarah Berthelson and how she and her family dealt with the loss of their son:

GRIEF - OH WHAT PAIN!

"Fear thou not for I am with thee; be not dismayed for I am thy God; I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea; I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness." Isaiah 41:10

To all that have lost a loved one, you know what grief is. The rest of you may not know the depths of this pain but there will come a day that you will be required to go through this also. Only through my faith in the Lord Jesus Christ did I get through a day. The first thing I did when my eyes opened each morning was think of my three sons, desiring to pray for them as I had done every day of their life. All of a sudden there was that realization that one was gone. I would cry and even call out loud to God, "Ky where are you? Why did you do this?" The heartache and pain in the pit in my stomach were almost unbearable. When I would go out in public, I would see someone that looked like him and I would want to go running to him. I could hear his voice. I could hear his car drive up. I could hear the front door open and know he was walking up the stairs. Oh my precious son, how I hurt!

Shay was living in Orlando, Fl. And Chad and his family were living in Pensacola, Fl. Chad, Brenda, their two month old little boy and Shay stayed with us two weeks following the funeral. When they returned to their homes, their planes left Memphis 5 minutes apart. I had held together pretty well so they wouldn't see me cry but when they turned to go to the plane, I thought I would die. George and I held on to each other as we walked, crying to the car.

Just to have something else to think about, George wanted to stop at a bearing shop to get some bearings for our nephew Phillip's go-cart. As he went in, I looked up to the most beautiful, clear, blue sky I had ever seen. With a stomach-wrenching cry, I said, "God if my baby is in the arms of Jesus, show me a bird". I saw this flicker way up in the sky and I thought it was an airplane. To my total amazement, here comes a bird, straight at my window and as I gazed at that bird, there came one from the left and one from the right and then all three birds flew up into the beautiful sky. I know this is hard for some of you to believe but it happened and it gave me a tremendous peace. When George came out of the shop, I shared what had happened. He did not doubt it for one minute. As I have shared this with friends it always brings tears. When I begin to doubt where my child is, I remember that moment when God sent the three birds to comfort this mother.

Shay moved home soon after Ky's death. It was such a blessing to have him with me but now I could see the grief in his eyes and as well as those of his father. We were hurting! It would not go away for any of us. It was there and it was real. I wanted to comfort my boys and my husband and I didn't know how.

I realized one day how I was pushing my loved ones away. I didn't understand myself. Then Shay said to me, "Mom I know what you are doing, if you push us away then if something happens to one of us, it won't hurt so badly." Oh no, I didn't want that. I didn't want to hurt my family. They were hurting just like me over our loss. Finally we came to a point that we could talk about Ky. We could talk about our feelings. My sons and husband realized we needed to talk to each other and share what we were feeling.

I remember the night that I realized my husband and I were just sitting and staring out in space or at the television, not saying a word to each other. I realized that this terrible hurt was tearing us apart as a couple. I knew I could not bear to lose my husband. I said, "honey you have to talk to me". He began to share his feelings with me; he had not been doing so because he did not want me to hurt more. He was a runner and he told me that as he ran by the spot where Ky died, he talked to him. He knew Ky would not be talking back to him but he felt better by expressing his feelings in this way. Then I knew that my husband was as torn to pieces as I was. I knew I must reach out to him and to love him through his pain. I wasn't the only one hurting

Knowing I did not want to push anyone of my loved ones out of my life, I began to share my hurts with them and they did with me. I cannot say if this helped the pain or not but it kept us close as a family. It took more than a year for us to be able to say, "I remember being here with Ky". Everywhere we looked we could think of a time that he had been there with us. It is still very hard to get picture albums out of the closet and go through the pictures of vacations and special occasions that we shared as a family.

Through this tragedy, I turned to God like never before. It seemed that after the funeral, my friends did not know what to say to us. I felt so alone in my pain. Only a couple of friends even came to see us. The church family did not know what to do for us, so Ky was not mentioned nor was our grief. If I could say anything to church leadership it would be to have an ongoing support group ministry for the grieving. George and I needed help so we turned to a support group outside our church family. It was not Christ centered and the people there did not know what to say to us either. They had become friends over a period of meeting together for three years. They were at the point they could laugh and enjoy the meeting. They just rehashed the past three years every week. I left as empty as I was when I came.

I knew then that all I needed was God. I got into His word as soon as I ate my breakfast every day. Sometimes I would spend an entire day just reading the Bible and talking to Him. It got to the point that I could feel his presence like he was sitting in the room with me. I loved it! I felt comforted. My God was so real to me. I had often given my testimony at churches and I was asked to share my testimony at the Naval Air Station. I had spoken there before but this time I said no. Months later I was asked again and I felt the Lord was telling me to share about Ky. I did! Because I shared my pain, I had many people come to me and share their grief. God has used my testimony in ways that I never thought possible. If you are grieving today, don't worry about people meeting the emptiness that you feel, turn to our Lord Jesus for the only real comfort available. He will never leave you nor forsake you. I know that he counted every tear that I shed and will continue to shed. May God bless you, as He has my precious family and me, as you go through this day, regardless of how you are hurting.

"I will praise Thee, O Lord, with my whole heart; I will tell all Thy marvelous works" (Psalms 9:1)

Sarah Berthelson*

Friends, please remember: When tragedy strikes, all you need is God! He's the only one who can get you through! These types of situations can drive us closer to Him, and when they do, our lives are blessed beyond compare. And sharing our pain with others is not only one way to help ease their pain, but it also helps to ease ours! Please join us next Saturday, for Dealing with Grief, Part 5: Dealing with Suicide

* Sarah Berthelson's Book "He Guides My Path", "Just Jesus" and "Only By His Grace"may be purchased at: Barnes And Noble.com, Target and Amazon.com This writing may be used in its entirety, with credits in tact, for non-profit ministering purposes. Sarah@Berthelson.com

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DAY ANCHOR

A phrase that appalls me of latter years is ‘God’s days’, used to promote the idea of extremely long ‘days’. Apparently the days of creation were supposed to be longer days than we have now and are deemed to have each been thousands of years.

It’s a belief with terrible consequences.

A cursory reading of the book of Jeremiah tells us just how terrible the consequences of the idea are. God said through Jeremiah, ‘It would be as unthinkable to annul the covenant that I made for the day and the night, so that they should fall out of their proper order, as to annul my covenant with my servant David, so that he would have none of his line to sit on his throne …’ Jeremiah 33.

When the Lord makes a covenant, it sticks so the question is ‘When did God make a covenant for the day and night?’

To my understanding it was made in Genesis, chapter 1, verse 3 and 4. ‘God said ‘Let there be light.’’ Then he separated the light from the dark and called it evening and morning and our length of day was established.

He never revoked the order and it counters any argument about ‘God’s days being longer than ‘our’ days. God defined what makes one day right there and it is exactly the same as today.

Furthermore, God told Jeremiah that day and night is a fixed order under covenant. He said, ‘If there were no covenant for day and night, and if I had not established a fixed order in heaven and earth, then I could spurn the descendants of Jacob and of my servant David and not take any of David’s line to be rulers over the descendants of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. But in my compassion I shall restore their fortunes.’ (Jeremiah 33).

If the fixed order of day and night can be altered, then God can dispense with David’s line. If David’s line is dispensed, there is no Christ. That is how terrible the idea really is.

Christ is anchored in the first day of the Bible.

Elizabeth Price

Announcements:

Be sure to join us on Saturday for Dealing with Grief. We have all had to deal with grief at some point in our lives, and our prayer is that somehow, your hard times will be eased a bit by this mini-series.

A HEAVENLY PERSON

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1 Cor. 13:13 NIV)

My new dog, Snoopy Girl is a morning person. She starts the day at full speed chasing her tail, the cats, and the other dogs. She wolfs down her breakfast with gusto before tearing down the hallway in search of new adventures. She says, "Good Morning" by taking a running leap up on the couch and giving anyone sitting there a shower of kisses. While she does all this I watch with awe, drink my orange juice, eat my oatmeal, and dream of going back to bed. I have often wondered how she has so much energy in the morning, but then I realized the simple truth the other day: she takes a lot more naps than I do.

I know a few people, however, who go beyond being just a morning or an evening person. These people may get tired and need naps just like the rest of us, but even when their energy is low their love is still high. They are Heavenly persons. They care, they laugh, and they smile even through the worst pains and challenges. They face life without fear. They share love with no thought of reward. And they meet death with a faith and peace that passes all understanding. They give all their days here to bring Heaven closer to Earth. They spend their whole lives showing the rest of us how to live in love and oneness with God.

The good news is that whether you are a morning person, an afternoon person, or an evening person you can be a Heavenly person too. You can choose love. You can choose joy. You can choose oneness with God every single day. You can share it all with everyone you meet. You can help to bring Heaven into the hearts, minds, and souls of others. You can help to make the world around you a better place morning, noon, and night. And even on those exhausting days when you stumble and fall you can rise up, dust yourself off, take your Heavenly Father's hand, and begin again to live as a Child of Heaven even while you are here on Earth.

By: Joseph J. Mazzella

Joe Mazzella is a writer and mental Health worker who lives in the mountains of West Virginia with his 3 children, 6 dogs, and 4 cats. He appreciates hearing from his readers. Oecool@wirefire.com

Announcements:

Would you like to make a difference in the world? Why not join the Answers2Prayer team? We have many volunteer positions. By joining in, you can help in carrying out the Great Commission: "Then Jesus came to them and said, 'All authority in Heaven and on Earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.'" (Matt 28:18-20 NIV) The time is right and we are in need of many laborers. "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field." (Matt 9:37-38 NIV).

If you feel compelled by God, let us know by sending an email to prayer@answers2prayer.org .

DEALING WITH GRIEF, Part 3

Today's Devotional: Dealing with grief is perhaps one of the hardest things that we, as humans, must do. Grief may be rooted in a death or illness, or it may be rooted in a loss, such as the loss of support, the loss of a spouse through divorce, the loss of a job, or even the feelings of abandonment that parents often go through as they realize they must allow their children to grow up. The focus of the upcoming 8 devotionals, that will be appearing in the next 8 Saturday editions of The Nugget, will be on how to deal with the grief. The first two devotionals focused on the grieving cycle, and these last eight will teach us important lessons about grief from specific and personal experiences of Nugget Writers. Our prayer is that you will be blessed by this series, and that somehow, whatever it is you are grieving, the lessons presented here will help you to get through. For former lessons on Dealing with Grief, please go to www.scripturalnuggets.org/folder6/DEALING_WITH_GRIEF.htm .


In Dealing with Grief Part 2, we learned how important it is to trust God in every stage of the grieving cycle. We need to seek His help to forgive, spend time with Him, bask in His glory, and we need to open our ears to His reassurance and to His comfort! In so doing, He will carry us through, and He will put together the broken pieces into something beautiful! Today's devotional will take us through some personal experiences of one of the Nugget Writers, Sally Kennedy:

IN THE VALLEY

"I will not leave you as orphans but will come to you....." (John 14:18)

Let's face it. There are times, when we walk through situations and seasons in our lives, when we are lonely. We even feel very much alone. No one is exempt. It's just part of life. In these past few weeks I have been walking through one of these valleys. At times, loneliness has quietly crept up and unexpectedly pounced on me. Sometimes seemingly from out of nowhere, sort of like being hit with a wave.

Even though I have felt lonely at other times, I haven't been in this valley before. Many, many relatives and friends, some I don't even know, have consoled, comforted, supported, and greatly loved me during this time. Countless kindnesses, prayers, and blessings. Yet some things we hold close, in our hearts, and they belong to no man except us.

I would rather be on a mountain top experience. I love those seasons. Yet I've learned most of life is lived somewhere in-between. And I've learned it's all good. And, it's all a gift.

All the years my dad lived alone, after mom died, I would often say to him, "I don't like you being alone on Sundays (or a holiday, or birthday)" and he would always say, "I'm not alone! Jesus is right here with me." He said it so often, that the reality of that finally began to sink in. In every way, Jesus was his companion, there at the house, right there with him.

As I've thought about this, the beautiful beloved 23rd Psalm came to mind, where David says, Even though I walk through the valley …….You are with me.

We all have been, or will be, in a valley season during our life journey. It is beautiful beyond belief, and peaceful beyond our finite mind's comprehension, to know and sense the truth of the words in the Bible that bring comfort and healing.

In the valley I may feel lonely, but am I alone? Not really; Jesus is with me. He's right here with me.

Sally I. Kennedy*

And what is the message that we need to carry with us when we are dealing with grief? Just this: We may feel totally alone when we go through our grief, but we are never really alone. God is always there with us, carrying us through. All we need to do is rely on Him. Please join us next Saturday, for Dealing with Grief, Part 4: GRIEF!

* Sally Kennedy is a songwriter, the creator of Poppy the Penguin® preschool music videos, and the author of Irish Thursdays: More Little Parables, Words from the Heart, and 52 Little Parables from Ireland . She lives in south Florida, with her husband Ben. Please visit her website: http://www.sallyikennedy.com

Announcements:

DEALING WITH GRIEF will be appearing in the next 12 Saturday editions of the Nugget. Be sure to join us for important lessons on how to deal with grief! If you've missed any of the previous lessons, they are published online at www.scripturalnuggets.org/folder6/DEALING_WITH_GRIEF.htm.

WIDOW WISDOM

I met a lonely widow woman the other day. She had a visitor staying with her, a paying guest, to support her and her son in their time of financial stress.

The paying guest was generous and they felt safe while he was with them. They felt he somehow protected them giving them confidence and a sense that all was well.

But something did go wrong. The widow’s son became ill and died and she immediately turned on the guest in anger and said, ‘What made you interfere?’

Then she cried out, ‘You came here to bring my sins to light and cause my son’s death!’

How could bringing her sins to light cause her son’s death?

And, reading between the lines, I got the feeling the guest saw an opportunity nobody expected.

All he said was, ‘Give me your son.’

And she did!

Please allow me to introduce you to the widow of Zarepath and her paying guest, Elijah.

I would like you to understand what I discovered when I met this story for real.

Like the Holy Spirit, Elijah ‘brought her sins to light.’ That is exactly what the Holy Spirit does, not by making us tell the story of our wrongdoings, but by his very presence he makes us aware that we are sinful, John 16:7-11.

The widow stood accused in her own mind and when her son died, she felt it was her fault. She was overcome with guilt and this is again the work of the Holy Spirit. We become aware that if we to not believe in the Saviour, we infect those around us and ultimately we cause their eternal destruction. The Holy Spirit, like Elijah, does not want this to happen.

This old Scripture story in 1st Kings 17, and it is one that has ‘the power to make you wise and lead you to salvation through faith in Christ Jesus,’ according to Timothy.

To change eternal outcomes, we need to allow the Holy Spirit to lead us to the Saviour,

So it leaves us with a question: when the Holy Spirit says, ‘Give me your son’ will we?

Elizabeth Price

Announcements:

Would you like to make a difference in the world? Why not join the Answers2Prayer team? We have many volunteer positions. By joining in, you can help in carrying out the Great Commission: "Then Jesus came to them and said, 'All authority in Heaven and on Earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.'" (Matt 28:18-20 NIV) The time is right and we are in need of many laborers. "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field." (Matt 9:37-38 NIV).

If you feel compelled by God, let us know by sending an email to prayer@answers2prayer.org .

THE KNOT'S GOT A NAME

"Call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you will honor me." Psalm 50:15

Down in the Florida Keys there’s a bait and tackle shop named Capt. Hook’s. It’s crammed full of fishing ‘stuff’. Small signs are on the walls, like “I’ve only got one nerve left, and you’re on it.” For some reason that came to mind as I was dealing with issues regarding my aging father, mainly about his driving the car. If you have an older parent, maybe you can relate to this: we didn’t want him driving any longer. His eyesight was not too good and he had some senile dementia. He was determined to keep driving. Only around town, of course. “Just to church, and the cemetery. Maybe the bank or grocery, but only in the daytime.”

One afternoon we got a call to come and get him; he’d been driving around for hours with no idea where he was. I don’t know who I was more worried about, him or someone in another car he might hit. I did know I was coming to the end of my rope with the driving situation. I prayed a little bit about it, but actually I was trying to figure all of this out on my own.

There’s a saying, “When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot in it.” It is best to go to the Lord first when we have problems. But when we don’t, and all else fails and we’re at the end of our rope, it’s good to remember the knot’s got a name. Jesus.

We prayed and I turned my dad and the whole situation over to the Lord. Not long after that, he decided to give the car away to someone very much needing transportation.

The plan is to remember to go to the Lord in prayer before I get to the end of my rope, and more importantly, Jesus is definitely the best ‘knot’ name.

Sally I. Kennedy

Sally I. Kennedy is a songwriter, the creator of Poppy the Penguin® preschool music videos, and the author of Irish Thursdays: More Little Parables, Words from the Heart, and 52 Little Parables from Ireland . She lives in south Florida, with her husband Ben. Please visit her website: http://www.sallyikennedy.com Email: sallyikennedy@bellsouth.net

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DEALING WITH GRIEF, Part 2: The Grieving Cycle, Part B: How to Keep From Getting Stuck

Today's Devotional: Dealing with grief is perhaps one of the hardest things that we, as humans, must do. Grief may be rooted in a death or illness, or it may be rooted in a loss, such as the loss of support, the loss of a spouse through divorce, the loss of a job, or even the feelings of abandonment that parents often go through as they realize they must allow their children to grow up. The focus of the upcoming 10 devotionals, that will be appearing in the next 10 Saturday editions of The Nugget, will be on how to deal with the grief. The first two devotionals will focus on the grieving cycle, and the last eight will teach us important lessons about grief from specific and personal experiences of Nugget Writers. Our prayer is that you will be blessed by this series, and that somehow, whatever it is you are grieving, the lessons presented here will help you to get through. For former lessons on Dealing with Grief, please go to www.scripturalnuggets.org/folder6/dealing_with_grief.htm .

In The Grieving Cycle, Part a, we learned that grief is a process with many stages. These include shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, testing, and finally, acceptance. It is the natural chain of emotion that we all go through when dealing with grief. The only problems arise when we get stuck in one of these phases.

What can we do to keep ourselves from getting stuck? Let's take a look at each of the individual stages:

The Shock Stage: After receiving the call in the middle of the night that my dad had passed away, I was too much in shock to do anything. I began to cry out to God in prayer. It wasn't a fancy prayer. It consisted more of: "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" But it wasn't long before the initial shock had passed enough for me to be able to think.

The Denial Stage: Once the shock had passed however, I began to beg God to bring dad back to life. I was in denial! But that all-important avenue of communication was open. God was able to help me understand that dad was really gone, but despite this, He would hold me together, He would help me through.

The Anger Stage: About 5 years later, when I received the phone call that my brother had died, I was at work. I had so many arrangements to make that there just wasn't time for prayer! I proceeded to become very angry at my brother. When I was given the opportunity at the funeral home to have time alone with him, I cried and I screamed. In the end however, I heard God's voice whispering to me: You need to forgive him! Only then did I realized that unforgiveness had caused me to get stuck in anger! But I couldn't forgive. It wasn't in me. So I asked God to help me forgive. He did! I was released from anger!

The Bargaining Stage: When told that I was going to lose the other Speech Pathologist on my team at work, I spent days pleading and reasoning with my manager. I was stuck in the bargaining stage. When I finally began to pray about it, I begged God to change the circumstances, even promising Him what I would do if He did. Instead of changing the circumstances, He gently began to reassure me that things would be okay, that He would give me the wisdom, time and strength to do what needed to be done on my own. Only then was I able to get out of the bargaining stage and begin to find viable solutions.

The Depression Stage: I became very depressed on the plane, while flying down to be with my mom after my dad's death. Fortunately for me, I was alone, and I began to pray. God began to help me see things differently. He began to show me that He would help bring me through, that somehow, it would all turn out to be something beautiful. I decided to put my trust in this promise, and the depression was lifted.

The Testing Stage: After my dad died we had to make some plans for caring for my mom. I remember a hundred different scenarios that my family put forward. Which one was the "right" one? Only God knew, and that's who we asked. And God clearly told us every detail of the new "picture". We followed His plan, and it led us to the final stage:

The Acceptance Stage. And praise be to God, by relying on Him, we can become firmly "stuck" in acceptance!

Do you notice the common thread, here, friends? It all leads back to taking it to God in prayer in every stage!

Remember, God understands grief better than any of us, because He's been there! He was forced to watch His beloved son hang from a cruel cross! His Spirit brooded around an empty throne for three days!

And God is there for us when we grieve. He guides us through our shock and denial. He helps us to forgive, to get through our anger. He comforts and reassures us in our depression. He provides us with wisdom, with solutions. He helps us through to acceptance.

Our job is to submit the loss, whatever it is, completely into His hands. Only when we have the faith to say, "Lord, I trust you with this, no matter what the outcome!"; only when we come to realize that God's love is in the middle of everything that happens and that somehow He will make something beautiful out of the pieces, can He move us through the cycle of grief. Only then can He set us free from whatever stage we've become stuck in.

Remember Jesus' words to His disciples when they were grieving? "Because I have said these things, you are filled with grief. But I tell you the truth: It is for your good that I am going away … You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy … Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy." (John 16:6-8, 20-22 NIV)

Are you in the middle of grieving, friends? Are you perhaps "stuck" in one of the stages? Take it to the Lord! Put the problems 100% in His hands! Trust Him in every stage! Seek His help to forgive! Spend time with Him, basking in His glory! Open your ears to His reassurance, to His comfort! Trust Him in every stage to get you through! And in so doing, He will carry you through, and He will put together the broken pieces into something beautiful! But only when we give it to Him!

But it all seems much simpler on paper than in real life, doesn't it? The upcoming devotionals in this series will provide you with examples of how God has carried His children through the grieving cycle. Our prayer is that through the personal, specific experiences of Nugget writers, you, too, will be able to come through the grief of your loss. Join us for Dealing with Grief, Part 3: In The Valley

In His love, Lyn

Lyn Chaffart, Mother of two teens, Speech-Language Pathologist, Author and Moderator for The Nugget, a tri-weekly internet newsletter, and Scriptural Nuggets, a website devoted to Christian devotionals and inspirational poems http://www.scripturalnuggets.org , with Answers2Prayer Ministries http://www.Answers2Prayer.org .

Announcements:

Would you like to make a difference in the world? Why not join the Answers2Prayer team? We have many volunteer positions. By joining in, you can help in carrying out the Great Commission: "Then Jesus came to them and said, 'All authority in Heaven and on Earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.'" (Matt 28:18-20 NIV) The time is right and we are in need of many laborers. "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field." (Matt 9:37-38 NIV).

If you feel compelled by God, let us know by sending an email to prayer@answers2prayer.org .

FAVOUR IN FAMINE

The world is resounding a song of an economic crisis. The song they are singing is , “This is one of the most tumultuous times on record in the global financial markets.”

The financial indicators have indicated major instability, cutbacks, retrenchment and shortfalls. The world’s economists who are the experts in the social science http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_science , of economics http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Economics , sound more like prophets of doom at present. Their pessimistic outlook has cast a shadow over 2009. Everywhere you look, the land is crying out for aid and relief.

Amidst the turmoil, the kingdom of God is either caught up by the recession or found to be rising above it. We as the church believe that though we live in the world, we are not off the world. In other words as God’s people we are not confined to the economy of the land but we live under the economy of heaven where there is no recession, no cutbacks and no shortfalls. As citizens of heaven, heavens reserves and resources govern us.

We do our part on earth by living under heavens standards and God will do his part by opening up the heavens and sending relief, aid, substance and abundance. He keeps us living above the tide of the world’s pressures. In Jeremiah 31:14 God’s word teaches us that we as his people shall be satisfied with his goodness. The goodness of God exceeds our wildest imagination and greatest expectation.

How do we know for certain that God will flourish us in times of famine? In Genesis 26 we read the following account of Isaac: "Now there was a famine in the land—besides the earlier famine of Abraham's time—and Isaac went to Abimelech king of the Philistines in Gerar."

The famine of the land was a set-up for God to show his magnitude and glory in Isaac’s life. Isaac was not taken away from the famine. Instead he flourished within it. God used this opportunity of economic distress as a platform to elevate his children. God’s promise to Isaac was not to run away from the famine but to remain steadfast and immovable and leave the rest up to him.

"The LORD appeared to Isaac and said, 'Do not go down to Egypt; live in the land where I tell you to live. Stay in this land for a while ..."

Obedience to the voice of God is imperative. When we listen accurately, we do not run around aimlessly and without vision. God’s word will preserve us and propel us to acquire the best. We will rise above the setbacks of the economy as a higher authority governs us.

God’s promise to Isaac was that: "...I will be with you and will bless you. For to you and your descendants I will give all these lands and will confirm the oath I swore to your father Abraham. I will make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and will give them all these lands, and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed ..."

God’s covenant of promise will not change and it stands firm for every generation. If under the law, Isaac lived in such a magnitude of blessing, imagine how much more we who are children under grace will live. We are a positioned people in times of world distress to be a beacon of hope. We are the relief the land is looking for and we have the answers. Jesus is the answer in our lives so lets rise above the world’s circumstances to lift Jesus higher that all men will be drawn unto him. Isaac had God’s Favour, which devoured the famine and rendered it to nought. Isaac obeyed God’s instruction and stayed in Gerar .In that year he reaped a hundredfold. He gained more and more until he became very wealthy. He had possessions of flocks and herds and many servants, so that the Philistines envied him. They even asked him to leave as he was mightier than them.

Wow, how awesome is our God. He reigns supreme and positions us to soar above all limitations. We are designed to live in the full measure of Christ. It is so important for us to remain positioned as God ordained and to live in the direct will of God. He places us to be blessed but also to be a blessing. God searches from among us Isaacs and Rebekahs to pour out his favour and splendour over us. We are a preserved people of power.

Favour in times of famine is our heritage as daughters of God. Blessings over our lives are contagious and the anointing will be imparted to all those around us. All nations will be blessed through us.

Lets cover our land with much prayer and stand in the gap as beacons for Christ.

A few thoughts for you:

Trust God to work out every situation. Pray at the altar until the winds are loosed to bring heavens change.

Pray for your place of employment that increase will come from the north, south, east and west. It does not matter which part of the chain you are in. If the business flourishes so will you.

Ask of God for divine wisdom to run your own businesses and give to God faithfully what is due to him.

God is the author and finisher of you and all that belongs to you

Stay focused and positioned. Don’t give in to doubt and despair. Be rooted in his promises and believe it to come to pass.

Cast your bread upon the waters and wait and after many days, it shall surely find you.

Strive to Shine in 2009 and be the best in your generation.

Hazel Moodley

Announcements:

DEALING WITH GRIEF will be appearing in the next 12 Saturday editions of the Nugget. Be sure to join us for important lessons on how to deal with grief! If you've missed any of the previous lessons, they are published online at www.scripturalnuggets.org/folder6/DEALING_WITH_GRIEF.htm.

IN THE LAST GREAT RACE

Each March more than sixty teams begin the "Last Great Race". They've trained all year to run over ice and snow, cross frozen rivers and open sea, face dangerous mountains and deadly storms, until they've gone almost 1200 miles. Each team has one unique member...a human...and sixteen incredible dogs. This is the Iditarod Trail Sled Dog Race. It's an amazing competition.

But why would a guy in warm Georgia get so caught up in a race way up in Alaska? We don't have mushers, sled dogs, or hardly any snow. It's because with every turn in the Trail, with every musher's story, at every checkpoint, I hear God speaking, using something there to teach me something here.

The landscape is awesome. Beautiful white snow covers almost everything, giving it a look of purity. The mountains are huge and majestic. The sunsets and sunrises are spectacular. And the Northern Lights dance across a night sky filled with stars. No sane person could truly believe this is all by accident.

Since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities - His eternal power and divine nature - have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse. (Romans 1:20)

From the age of 18 to 68, mushers come from different backgrounds and countries. Some are well off, others struggle. Most have good health, a few are recovering from cancer, at least one has diabetes and one is legally blind. Only one will finish first, but all work hard to get to the starting line and compete.

Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. (1 Corinthians 9:24b-25)

From Anchorage to Nome, beginning to end, crowds cheer on the teams. While the mushers are polite, wave and even take time to sign a few autographs, their focus remains on the prize.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider Him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (Hebrews 12:1-3)

Each is compelled, as the Apostle Paul said of his own race, not knowing what will happen to me but that hardships are facing me. (Acts 20:22,23) Some will lose their way, all will question themselves. You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? That kind of persuasion does not come from the One who calls you. (Galatians 5:7-8) Yet they will continue on.

Not all will make it to the end. Some withdraw because of injury or fatigue, some out of concern for their dogs. Still, those around them continue to lift their spirits, encouraging them toward the next start. Let us encourage one another - and all the more as you see the Day approaching. (Hebrews 10:22)

But what I like best about the Iditarod is that it isn't over with the first to cross that line. Picture this. It's 8:30 a.m., -15 F (-26 C), in Nome, Alaska. The winner arrived 3 days ago! But here come two mushers, a man and a woman, numbers 39 and 40 to make it. And even in the bitter cold of this morning, people have gathered to welcome them. The mushers have won the prize, because they finished the race!

I think Heaven will be like that, though hopefully not as cold. After all our struggles, pain and hardships, all the times we've questioned ourselves and wondered if it's really worth it...we will have been encouraged along the Way, we will make it to the end, we will finish the race...and those who have finished before us will be waiting with the Host of this Last Great Race to welcome us home.

We each have our own race and it's a race worth running. May we all be able to say...

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day - and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for His appearing. (2 Timothy 4:6-8) Take care and be God's,

Chuck Graham

is a registered trademark of Ciloa, Inc., a non-profit 501(c)(3) organization. A Note of Encouragement is a copyright interest held by Ciloa, Inc. Ciloa is funded entirely by the donations of those seeking to share God's encouragement with the world.

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DEALING WITH GRIEF, Part 1: The Grieving Cycle, Part a: Definitions and Dangers

Today's Devotional: Dealing with grief is perhaps one of the hardest things that we, as humans, must do. Grief may be rooted in a death or illness, or it may be rooted in a loss, such as the loss of support, the loss of a spouse through divorce, the loss of a job, or even the feelings of abandonment that parents often go through as they realize they must allow their children to grow up. The focus of the upcoming 12 devotionals, that will be appearing in the next 12 Saturday editions of The Nugget, will be on how to deal with the grief. The first two devotionals will focus on the grieving cycle, and the last eight will teach us important lessons about grief from specific and personal experiences of Nugget Writers. Our prayer is that you will be blessed by this series, and that somehow, whatever it is you are grieving, the lessons presented here will help you to get through.

Grief.

It's an age-old emotion, one that was even outlined in the Bible:

"When they came together in Galilee, he said to them, 'The Son of Man is going to be betrayed into the hands of men. They will kill him, and on the third day he will be raised to life.' And the disciples were filled with grief." (Matt 17:22-23 NIV)

There is a process that we all go through when something bad happens. It's called the grieving cycle. You've all heard of it, it's the natural chain of emotion that we experience when dealing with grief. It has been described in the following way:

Shock stage: Initial paralysis at hearing the bad news. Denial stage: Trying to avoid the inevitable. Anger stage: Frustrated outpouring of bottled-up emotion. Bargaining stage: Seeking a way out. Depression stage: Final realization of the inevitable. Testing stage: Seeking realistic solutions. Acceptance stage: Finally finding the way forward.

Although this has been described as a cycle, experts now tell us that it is more of a process. It is natural, it is normal, it is healing. The only problems arise when we get stuck in one of these phases.

In Dealing with Grief, Part 1, we will be looking at defining the different stages of the grieving cycle, and discussing possible outcomes of getting stuck in any one of these stages, and in Dealing with Grief, Part 2, we will be looking at how to safeguard ourselves from getting stuck in these stages!

Let's take a look at each stage individually:

The Shock stage: It is a normal thing. You hear bad news, and you are in shock. When I received the call that my brother had committed suicide, I couldn't even respond. I just sat there in my office, my cell phone to my ear, with my mouth hanging open sputtering about how I didn't have a good connection. Perfectly normal. But what if I had stayed in this stage? You hear stories of people who have heart attacks and die over the shock of bad news. Others become mute, unresponsive. Why? Because their minds cannot deal with what they have heard.

The Denial Stage: Human nature dictates that we try to avoid the inevitable. When I received news that my dad had passed away, my first response was this: "No, they must have gotten it wrong! It couldn't have been my DAD you were talking about who had a heart attack! He was a picture of health!" Again, very normal. But what if I had never gotten beyond this stage? I would have never gone to the funeral. I wouldn't have been there for my mom and my husband. I would have just continued my life in status quo, though somewhere along the line, I might have begun to get angry at my dad for not contacting me!

The Anger Stage: It is perfectly human for us to become angry at the one(s) who have hurt us. And not only is it perfectly natural, it is also necessary! We cannot keep those pent-up emotions inside! We have to let them out! Before my brother's funeral, I had the opportunity to have a private visitation. Up until this point, I had been pretty strong, and it wasn't until that moment that I realized how angry I was. And I laid all of my frustrated anger out in that private room, where no one could hear me, and I left feeling refreshed. What would have happened had I not done so? Unforgiveness would have moved in and I would have become bitter and angry. We've all met angry people, people who have been hurt by someone or something and who never get over it. Either they have no avenue for release, or they do not employ it and they never forgive.

Bargaining Stage: When faced with bad things, it's natural for us to seek a way out. When told that I was going to lose the other Speech Pathologist on my team at work, I went out and bargained. I begged, I pleaded, I reasoned, I did everything in my power to help my manager and those above her to realize how this was a very bad idea. Why? Because I felt helpless. It gave me something to do. If I had become stuck in this stage however, I would have never been able to come up with reasonable alternatives!

Depression Stage: Okay, so we have been in shock, we have been in denial, we've been angry, we've even tried bargaining, but nothing is helping. What now? This is where the brain shuts down and quits trying. This is the depression stage. Again, very, very natural. Not so long ago, I became overwhelmed with new referrals at work. I couldn't keep up! Since I have a strong work ethic, it wasn't long before all of my thoughts were consumed with the fact that the work was piling up and my patients weren't getting the care they needed. It came to the point that I could no longer find joy in anything around me. We've all experienced what it's like to get stuck in the depression stage! What sad lives we live until we break out!

Testing Stage: This is the stage where healing begins to happen. After my dad died, I spent a bit of time in this stage, planning different scenarios for my mom, for my family, trying to figure out what would be the best way to go on without him. This is an important stage, but it is also important to eventually stop planning and move ahead. Otherwise, the problem never gets resolved. I did finally find a scenario that worked, and when we moved ahead to pursue it, it led to:

Acceptance Stage: We were able, as a family, to move forward. This is the one stage, friends, that it's okay to get stuck in!

But how can we avoid getting stuck in one of these stages? Join us next week, for The Grieving Cycle, Part b: How to Keep From Getting Stuck!

In His love, Lyn

Lyn Chaffart, Mother of two teens, Speech-Language Pathologist, Author and Moderator for The Nugget, a tri-weekly internet newsletter, and Scriptural Nuggets, a website devoted to Christian devotionals and inspirational poems http://www.scripturalnuggets.org , with Answers2Prayer Ministries http://www.Answers2Prayer.org

Announcements:

DEALING WITH GRIEF will be appearing in the next 12 Saturday editions of the Nugget. Be sure to join us for important lessons on how to deal with grief! If you've missed any of the previous lessons, they are published online at www.scripturalnuggets.org/folder6/DEALING_WITH_GRIEF.htm.